"Forgive me Father, I must confess, This is a business, not a creche!" - Lawrence Bartley
If you're reading this, it's because you think hypnosis can help you overcome a problem you have, right?
Lawrence "Crown Prince of Hypnosis" Bartley
But, if you're like most people, you're probably not yet convinced if hypnosis even can help you. . . if I'm the person who can help you. . . or if your specific problem can even be solved. . .
So, I'm challenging YOU!
Put my skills to the test!I'm giving out a FREE hypnosis for sleep recording as a bribe gift to everyone on my email list.So, if you want to see if my hypnotic wizardry can help you, listen to the hypnosis for sleep recording.One of two things is going to happen:
1) You get the best sleep of your life! Peaceful! Restful! Waking up with lighting energy in the morning, but there's more. . .Because not only will you have an amazing night, you'll also have proof there's something to this hypnosis voodoo wizardry. And. . .you'll also be in the perfect spot (my email list) to learn about HOW hypnosis can help you solve the problem you came here for!Or. . .2) The recording fails. Nothing happens. You unsubscribe from my list. Forget I ever existed. And find someone else to help you.
What do you have to lose?
"What if your voice is like crushed glass scraping my ears?"
"Crushed GLASS! Scraping your EARS!" Wow. Rude. . . I have feelings too, ya know 😢.Sound of my voice doesn't matter. What matters is whether or not you follow the instructions in the recording.Follow the process in the recording, you'll sleep so deep you'll wake up buried alive. . . I mean, people will call you Sleeping Beauty!
"Will the background music drive me into a homicidal rage?"
If it does, you're probably a maniac since there'sNO background music!
"What if the sleep hypnosis wears off?"
Hypnosis doesn't "wear off" (but that's a topic for the email list. Or a search engine. Don't be lazy!).But, let's pretend, it DOES wear off. . . What's stopping you from listening to the recording again?
So, my bribe gift of the best nights sleep hasn't enticed you into entering the Labyrinth, yet?If you're like most people, you're probably wondering what you'll get from Joining The Labyrinth. . .apart from one of the most valuable hypnosis recordings in the universe (considering how many problems an awful night's sleep causes, it's not a 100% exaggeration),
Inside The Labyrinth You'll Learn The Way Of:
Neck-cranking your insecurities to death,
No longer being a slave to other people. . .
Learning the Secret Art of confidence. . .
Shoving a stake in the Procrastination Parasite and burn it to death with sunlight. . .
Slaying your fears. . .
Stealing brain programming hacks that you won't find on Google. . .
Clearing out the emotional gunk clotting up your brain!
Learning what mental health fads are actually poisoning your brain!
Reveling in secret knowledge the experts with bosses won't tell you. . .
MURDERING!!! The demons haunting your skull!
Becoming the Lion-Blood Version of YOU!
And so much more. . .
"If you want normal, waste 5 years in psychotherapy!
If you want results, get a hypnotist!" - Lawrence Bartley
The Labyrinth is deep and dark and full of shadows
Can YOU To Endure The Depths!?
If You:
Are too whiney to be a problem solver. . .
Want to live in the Cage of Normality because you're 'fraid to step into The Weird World o' Your Unconscious Mind. . .
Are a humourless, soulless corpse masquerading as a person. . .
Are psychotic (Not a joke, lots of people with email lists get death threats and I ain't tolerating that). . .
Love using your insecurities as an excuse to be offended. . .
Want an emotional support pet because you're too lazy to deep emotional work. . .
Reply to any of my emails with a thousand emoji's like an insane person. . .
Still believe hypnosis is some form of counselling (really, in this day and age). . .
Are too delicate for a DAILY email list. . .
. . . the Labyrinth Newsletter isn't for you!But, if you ARE capable of walking into the abyss, facing the monsters, and conquering the darkness. . .Both the labyrinth and the dragon energy version of you await. . .
“Insanity is wasting your life as a nothing when you have the blood of a killer flowing in your veins. Insanity is being sh*t on, beat down, coasting through life in a miserable existence when you have a caged lion locked inside and a key to release it.” — Sloan “Wanted”
Life is short! Do you still want to be in therapy on your deathbed!?
Give Me One Hour And Your Anxietiy WILL Melt
Out Of Your Body!
Get Your Killer Energy BACK!
Become Friends With Your Brain Again!
And Be The Lion-Blood Version Of YOU!
Let Me Defend You, Real Quick. . .
You never asked to have anxiety. Whatever dark event(s) caused it, was NOT your fault! And if you're like most people, you probably a problem solver who tried, at least, one of these:
Counselling/ Talk Therapy - But even after a hundred sessions, you STILL have anxiety. . .
Life Coaching - But the motivation was temporary. So your anxiety started screaming again. . .
Relaxing - Except your brain's so loud you can't relax.
Meditation Apps - But once you hit the off button, the problem returned. . .
Swallowing Buckets of Pills with side effects Zombifying Your Sex Life - And taking more pills for the side effects. . .
Plant Medicine - To control your anxiety, ended up being controlled by it instead. . .
Exercise - Despite helping with stress, something's still GNAWING at you. . .
Eating healthier - Yet no amount of clean food solved the "I'm not good enough", "I'm screaming and no one can hear me", "I'm broken, defective, and bad" rattling around your skull. . .
Breathing techniques - Made you light-headed. And the anxious rot is still in your body . .
A.I Therapy - Hundreds of hours later, you still have anxiety, don't you?
And if you're willing to see a hypnotist, NONE of those so-called "solutions" worked for you. Lemme tell you WHY they failed and HOW hypnosis succeeds where they can't.
The REAL Reason You HAVEN'T (Yet) Slain The Anxiety Monster!
These so-called "solutions" target the symptom (anxiety), NOT the real problem (the mental gunk causing anxiety in the first place)!
Meaning the moment you're away from the pills, life coaches, or Mr. Therapist Man. . . Anxiety Strikes Back!So, you might be wondering, what makes hypnosis different. . .
9 Reasons Why Hypnosis Shines, Where Therapists, Coaches, And Buckets Of Pills Failed:
Hypnosis targets anxiety at a subconscious level! - Anxiety is process in your subconscious (the background operating system of your mind). Meaning talking to your conscious mind, like a therapist, is talking to the WRONG part! I talk to the right part.
Hypnosis teaches you how to drain the brain pain from dark memories! Meaning you can stop reliving the past, start moving forward again!
No side effects! - Millions throughout history have been hypnotised. Not a single one has ever had a side effect.
Your Logic Brain and your Anxiety Brain talking to each other instead of strangling each other! So your mind works FOR you again!
Doesn't matter how long you've had anxiety! 10 days or 10 years, same brain circuit so hypnosis still works!
Anxiety vanishes FOREVER! - Hypnosis unwires the anxiety circuit in your brain. So, once it's gone, it's gone for good!
Solution-focused! - I'm here to help you find solutions, not let you drown in self-pity!
Fast Results! - I did mention it's only One Hour, right?
Content-FREE! - Meaning I can help you without needing to know any of the personal details. Hell, I can do hypnosis WITHOUT you EVER talking. So long as you're nodding or shaking your head, it's fine.
Step-By-Step
How YOU Are Going To Slay Your Anxiety!
We meet on zoom.
We see if we're a solid fit to work together. . .
We go through formalities: How bad is the problem on a scale of 0 to 10? What would you like to replace the anxiety with (dragon energy, berserker confidence, love for all mankind, etc.)?
We do a set of neurological exercises (warms your brain up for cleaning out mental gunk).
Enter hypnosis. I guide you into a trance and we explore your subconscious to find solutions.
YOU (I can't do it for ya) slay the anxiety monster!
I guide your subconscious to find resources to install the (dragon energy, berserker confidence, love for all mankind, etc. . .) from step 2,
Exit hypnosis. Welcome to the anxiety-free world!
However (and this is important),
Some people experience TEMPORARY! icky feelings during hypnosis!Why?Because to clear out every drop of anxiety from your system, your brain's anxiety circuit needs to be activated. But. . .Once the mental gunk causing anxiety has been released. . . the icky feelings vanish. And. . .
your anxiety will be gone forever!
I've Helped Over 75+ People Slay Their Anxiety Monsters!
Here's What Some of Them Said:
So, If You're Missing Out On:
Driving a car without panic-induced barrel rolls running down every pedestrian in sight. . .
Controlling YOUR Life again!
Waltzing into your job or university WITHOUT ickiness in your gut!
Being untriggerable!
Breaking the cycle of sleep deprivation. The one making your anxiety worse. . .
Slaying the Procrastination Parasite!
The SUCCESS you deserve!
Speaking to women without knee-trembling jelly legs!
Remembering you have the blood of a lion in your veins!
Making friends. . .
Sleeping without Googling your symptoms at 3 am!
Freedom from worrying about how much you worry. . .
Shoving a stake through the Snake of Self-Pity!
Peace!
Designing your destiny!
Living your best life!
Giant F*ck You Dragon energy. . .
Enjoying a healthy relationship! No paranoia! No constant worry! Breathing easy!
Feeling safe again! No more constant fight or flight mode!
Breathing with confidence instead of tightness in your chest!
Being clear of mental gunk. . .
Updating your mental software. . .
Waking up with WINNER ENERGY!
Social confidence!
Emotional freedom!
Slaying your demons!
What will your life look like when you've achieved all that?How confident will you be?What would you lose if you became the BEST version of YOU?
"How much does this cost?" - You Ask
"A one-time payment of 800 EURO!" - I reply.
(About as much as top lawyers and doctors charge. Except fixing your brain programming is a LOT more valuable!)
"But some hypnotists only charge 50 EURO?!"
Then go get help from them, Pokey. Just know you'll get EXACTLY what you pay for!How much time, energy, and expertise do you expect to get for 50 EURO?The only way cheap hypnotists can make a living is by dragging you through programs where the change is temporary! So you keep coming back and paying them them! With me, you only pay once. And if I ever decide to raise my price, it WON'T affect you!
(If you ever hear someone say "I tried hypnosis before and it didn't work?" Ask them how much they paid for it.)
"Wait! What if I'm someone who needs MULTIPLE sessions!?"
In the unlikely event you're one of the few people who needs a second, or even a third session. . .
I've got something for you. . .
Lawrence Bartley's Lifetime Guarantee!
NOTE: This is NOT a money-back guarantee!
Any Future Anxiety Session You Have With Me - Between Now And The Heat Death of The Universe - Is FREE!
Whether it's because you need an extra session, you've got more than one anxiety, or you developed a new anxiety 20 years from now - I'll still help you for FREE!Also you'll be safe from any price changes, should I ever decide to raise my prices, because you already paid.
Note: This guarantee only applies to anxiety. Should you wish to work with me on something else (like stop smoking or screen addiction) you will have to pay for the new problem.
"This Lifetime Guarantee seems
easy to abuse. . ."
Or it would be . . . if it wasn't for the meddling Lifetime Guarantee only applying to people I decide to take on as clients!If I decide NOT to work with you, you'll get a refund.
(Lawrence Bartley Hypnosis, like all service businesses, has the right to refuse service to any client who is abusive or makes me uncomfortable.)
Now, if you're like most people, you might be thinking:
"I DON'T believe you! My therapist told me anxiety is with you for life! And you say you can get rid of it in one hour! I mean c'mon, really? REALLY?!?"
Why Therapists LIED To You!
Note: I am NOT saying it's because pharma companies pour money into universities and medical schools which is why psychotherapists can't help people without using medication!
Therapists are trained to talk to your surface level mind.But anxiety DOESN'T live on the surface. . .Anxiety lives inside your brain's background operating system. Also known as: The Subconscious Mind!The hypnotic process speaks to the subconscious mind!Speaking to THE RIGHT PART lets you dissolve the Anxiety Prison, So fast it feels like magic!
"But my anxiety's unique! I don't think your process will work for me!"
What Experts With Bosses Won't Tell You (So They Don't Get Fired)!
(Or do you think the therapy industry is the ONE place where disagreeing with you boss has zero consequences?)
All anxieties live in the SAME area of your brain! No matter:
WHERE it came from. . .
How LONG you've had it. . .
How it AFFECTS you. . .
Meaning, no matter how unique your problem, my process STILL works! Because it works on EVERY anxiety!
"But, I'm still gonna have to share my personal secrets to you, aren't I? I'll get in trouble if I tell!"
Burn Anxiety To Ashes
WITHOUT
Sharing Secrets, Traumatic Stories, or Personal Info!
It's called Content-Free Hypnosis!See, your brain has the tools to solve anxiety. But no one ever showed you WHERE to tools were. Or HOW to use them.I guide you to slay the mental gunk with the tools all brains are born with. Meaning. . .
Your Secrets. . .
Your Trauma Stories. . .
Your Personal Info. . .
Have ZERO IMPACT
On the Process!
So feel free to keep your secrets to yourself!😎
Reasons You SHOULDN'T Do This!
This is NOT for you if you:
Drink 6+ cups of coffee a day (How are you supposed to keep the anxiety away when you're pumping that much anxiety-juice into your blood?)
Are on medication with anxiety as a side effect. . .
Still think, in 2025, hypnosis is mind control magic (Read the FAQ page so you can join the smart people again). . .
Are looking to go venting instead of doing deep internal work!
Can't tolerate some TEMPORARY pain to achieve your goals later!
Think it's everyone else who needs to change. . .
Follow My Process, It WILL Be The Last Time You Feel Anxiety!
Disclaimers:
All my sessions are recorded.
You must be over 18.
I don't work with people who have these conditions: schizophrenia, pathological personality, alcohol or drug psychosis, senility, epilepsy and narcolepsy, bi-polar condition, clinical depressive illnesses or exhibiting suicidal tendencies, or a serious heart condition.
I only work with individuals.
I don’t work with vulnerable adults.
I am NOT a substitute for conventional medicine.
I do not treat, prescribe, or diagnose: diseases, serious conditions, or psychiatric disorders.
If you're sick of anxiety gnawing your face off. . .
ask yourself. . .
Do you deserve peace from those vile feelings?
What would you lose if you let go of anxiety?
Do you still believe it's impossible to be free of anxiety?
What would you do with your new confidence?
Who do you want to be? A slave bowing down to the Anxiety Monster? Or the knight who slays the beast?
You've seen HOW I can help YOU. You've seen testimonials from other people I helped.I CAN help you too, if you to reach out to me.
So make a decision. . .
A "Yes, take my money🤑!" or "No! Burn at the stake, you hypnotic scum🔥!"If there's a part of you that wants freedom from the Anxiety Cage, click the button below. Because life is short.
And you don't have to live in a mind prison anymore.
"Hey, I have questions!"
And I have an FAQ page I put a lot of effort into!And a Contact Me page I put barely any effort into!
“Hey, I skimmed all the way to the end without reading. Could you give a short summary, please?”
I'm not your mother, go back and read.
So, you want to learn more about me, eh?
Meet Your Hypnotist:
Hi, my name's Lawrence Bartley.And the mission, is to help as many people break their mental cages, before God decides I've lived too long and locks me up in a dirt box.So if ugly brain programming is clogging up your skull, your own mind is gnawing at you. . .and you still have the problem after years of "normal help" (therapy, counselling, coaching, etc). . .you're in luck!Hypnosis often helps where "normal" fails. And if you're qualified to work with me, I can help you break your mental prisons, find peace, and get the freedom you deserve!"normal" has never produced exceptionalSo if you're looking for an exceptional solution, click the button below! Because you deserve the BEST!
Crown Prince Of Hypnosis!
(No one said I couldn't, so I'm taking the title! MUHUHAHAHA!!!)
Certifications:
Certified and acknowledged by NLP Canada,
Certified Mike Mandel Hypnosis Academy,
Certified UK Hypnosis Academy,
Certified Jacquin Hypnosis Academy,
Certified Kinetic Shift Practitioner,
North American Academy Of Hypnosis - Stop Smoking Specialist
Certified by Hypnotherapy Training Northern Ireland
Hypnosis so safe, Hollywood won't make money off of it!
Because when most people hear hypnosis they think of pocket watches, spirals, and mind controlled zombie-like people (really Hollywood, really?), don’t they?
Hypnosis is a process!
Not mind control. It's a step-by-step system you follow to:
Burn the mind gunk holding you back,
And build the confidence to move forward again.
You still have free will!
When you realise hypnosis is a process, you'll also realise it's up to you to go with it.You can leave at any time. Of course, if you ignore the process, don't expect results.So, if you want this, you must be responsible for following my instructions.
Your secrets are safe with you!
Since you're in control of trance, you can leave if you're about to reveal secrets.Many people, like the CIA, have tried to do get people to spill their secrets with hypnosis. It never worked because it's a TV myth.
You will NOT be the first person stuck in hypnotic trance!
🥳Content-Free Hypnosis!🥳
If you value your privacy, this is the most important thing to know about.Content-Free means we do hypnosis and we NEVER discuss specific details of your problem."That doesn't make and sense! How could you POSSIBLY help me solve my problems if you don't know what they are?"I don't, you do!Your brain has the tools and resources to solve ALL its problems. But it doesn't know WHERE the tools are. Or HOW to use them. Or HOW to connect them to the problem.I guide you to find the tools. And show your subconscious how to use them to slay your problems.I guide you to the Beast! But, you'll be the one SLAYING the monster!
"Aaaaand. . . SLEEP!!!"
You've probably seen it, haven't you?Videos of hypnotists walking up to people, yanking on their arms, yelling "SLEEP!" and the person just flops to the floor. It's dramatic. It's impressive. And. . .if you're like most people you say something like "Wow, there's no way I could do that." And you'd be right. You couldn't. And in your defence, if it was real, neither could the hypnotist.What you didn't see is the off camera hypnosis that made the "magic" happen. The person who flops to the floor. . . was already hypnotised.
It's called a Rupar. . .
A rupar is a misleading video (Normal for entertainment industry),where context is removed (person already being hypnotised)so you're left with a false impression (hypnosis is a voodoo mind control magic).
"B-but. . . the stage hypnotists! Surely that's real!"
It's called The Class Clown Problem!
When you went to school, you had a class clown, right? Someone who enjoyed being a fool in front of everyone. No sense of embarrassment. Did the craziest things in front of people for entertainment.Now, imagine how many class clowns there are in a crowd of 500 people.And imagine how much crazy stuff they'll do if you took away their responsibility. Because they get to say they were hypnotised.The people on stage want to do crazy stuff.
Why Hollywood tricks you into thinking hypnosis is mind control magic. . .
It's called The Gamma Ray Problem!
(I'm sensing a naming pattern here 🤔)
Here's the story:Stan Lee (the man who invented The Incredible Hulk, The Fantastic Four, and many more superheroes you've probably heard of) had a problem.He needed to turn a scrawny scientist named Bruce Banner, into The Incredible Hulk. He needed a process that SOUNDED good. Something his audience would love.So, he exposed Bruce Banner to Gamma Ray Radiation! And thus The Hulk was born!The audiences loved it. The Incredible Hulk became one of the most iconic superheroes and . . .Stan Lee had no idea what gamma rays were. Because he was a comic book writer, not a scientist. But. . .he knew Gamma Rays SOUNDED cool.He know his audience would love it.So he went with it, using Gamma Ray Radiation as the magic process that created The Hulk.
Likewise. . .
When Hollywood directors need characters brainwashed, mind-controlled, they have the same problem Stan Lee had.They need to show their audience a magical process with a name that sells the idea their characters are acting against their free will.So they call it "hypnosis".Because it SOUNDS magical. It has an air of mystery to it. And the audience loved it.Hollywood hypnosis isn't real. It's just entertainment.
More Frequently Asked Questions
"Is there anything I might need to have ready for this session?"
A good chair, strong wi-fi, and a decent webcam.Sometimes people can get thirsty after hypnosis so maybe a bottle of water.
"I don't want to do this in my bedroom. Can I do it in my car?"
As long as you're not driving, and you've got a solid internet connection, it's fine.
Is hypnosis a placebo?
No. It works even if you don’t believe in it. Because when you follow the process, you get the result regardless of your belief.
But, can I even be hypnotised? I’m a mega GENIUS with a diamond-hard superman-like WILLPOWER!
Since you're smart, I don't need to tell you hypnosis is a process. Follow the process, you’ll get the results.And, if anything, your genius and willpower will make you better at going deeper and getting the results you want.
Am I too old for hypnosis?
No. The only requirements are:1) you're intelligent and,
2) you're intelligentAs long as you're smart I don't care how old you are.
How many sessions does hypnosis take?
Most people only need one session. But some people may need two.I don't book things for you. So it's up to you if you want another session or not.
Are there side effects to hypnosis?
Your background operating system is going to be burning brain calories when it starts lifting emotional dumbbells, so you may feel hungry or thirsty after.
Is online hypnosis safe?
Yes, just make sure you've a decent chair.
"Um. . . I still don't think I can be hypnotised. . ."
Y'know who else couldn't be hypnotised?Bobo the Chimpanzee. He didn't have the brain power either.So if you're lacking in the big brain energy department. . . hypnosis might not be for you.But if you're one of the few people smarter than a chimpanzee, then maybe. . . just maybe. . . this hypnosis stuff could work for YOU!
I still have questions.
And I still have email, right here: Lawrence@lawrencebartley.com.Or DM on X, right here: @Law_BartleyOr join my email list, here: lawrencebartley.com
So, you wanna listen to my podcasts, interviews, and live events?
So, you wanna read my blog posts?
Well, here they be. . .
Lawrence Bartley Hypnosis - Stop Smoking
"If nicotine was the reason you smoke,
nicotine replacement would work" - Lawrence Bartley
But first, an announcement from your favourite neighborhood hypnotist. . .
NO FORCE IN HEAVEN, EARTH, OR HADES WILL EVER HELP YOU STOP SMOKING. . .UNTIL YOU DECIDE TO STOP SMOKING! NOT YOUR WIFE, HUSBAND, OR DOCTOR! YOU!
If you're one of the people who's here because someone else is tricking, nagging, or extorting you into being here, DON'T DO THIS!!!
Furthermore:
IF YOU'RE TRYING TO QUIT SMOKING
WITHOUT
HAVING TO STOP SMOKING. . .
Then, this is not for you. Come back when you're ready to STOP smoking.
"Hey, I AM serious about quitting! In fact, I've already tried using willpower!"
Respect for trying, but your method of execution needs work and here's why:
The Reason Willpower Fails:
Right now, as you read this, there's a war inside your skull.A war between one part of you screaming for a smoke. . .And another part fighting tooth and nail to prevent you from smokingYou Are LITERALLY Fighting Yourself When You Try to Quit Using Willpower!And when you fight against yourself, you can only lose.
The Trick to Stop Smoking:
Unite your brain.Get those parts to stop beating each other with sticks, start negotiating.Then, give the part craving a cigarette, a healthier habit to crave instead, like a deep breathing practice.Do that, you'll discover your craving to smoke has vanished. So fast it seems like magic.
"But, HOW do I actually DO that?"
Simple, get a hypnotist.
How a Stop Smoking Hypnosis Session Works:
We have a 60 minute long zoom meeting.
We go through formalities like: Making sure you know what's going to happen. How bad is the problem on a scale of 0 to 10?
I'll take you through hypnosis.
I help you install new habits to replace the smoking one.
Exit hypnosis. You are now a non-smoker.
Stabbing An ICY NEEDLE called Math Into Your BRAIN!
Because if you're like smart people, you're probably aware asking how much this costs without asking yourself THESE questions, is dumb. . .
How much does a pack of cigarettes cost you?
How many do you packs do you smoke per day?
Multiply by 365 and how much does smoking cost you PER YEAR?
If you're like the average smoker, it's probably around 4000 EURO (you could have a holiday in Las Vegas with that) per year!
(You're basically getting paid to stop smoking!)
So How Much Does This Cost?
I'm not going to be the person who says, "long term, you'll save money from not buying cigarettes."Nor will I mention how much you save in hospital fees.Or how the average smoker gets 12 years of life back!Won't mention it at all. . . What I will tell you is:
A Stop Smoking Session costs 1600 EURO and lasts One Hour!
Why is Stop Smoking more expensive than your Other Sessions?
Different problems, different processes. And stop smoking requires I can trust you to:
Want to stop smoking! Not your wife, husband, or doctor. . .
Be SERIOUS about quitting! Not a "I'm just going to try this, see if it works, hope for the best" type of person. . .
Follow my process to the best of your abilities!
(Though with the money you'll save, you'll probably make the 1600 back in less than half a year.)
Lawrence Bartley Lifetime Guarantee!
This is NOT a money-back guarantee!
People are cocky.Sometimes a person can go an entire year without cigarettes, then think:"You know, I've been super amazing this year by not smoking, so what if I "reward" myself with just one".Then they fall into smoking again.A Lifetime Guarantee means, should you ever decide to "reward" yourself by inhaling a poison that tastes disgusting, looks ugly in front of your friends and family, and is a symbol of regret. . .I'll help you stop smoking again - for free!
(Lawrence Bartley Hypnosis, like all service businesses, has the right to refuse service to any client who is abusive or makes me uncomfortable.)
Life is short. You can be a non-smoker in ONE hour!
Disclaimers:
All my sessions are recorded.
You must be over 18.
I don't work with people who have these conditions: schizophrenia, pathological personality, alcohol or drug psychosis, senility, epilepsy and narcolepsy, bi-polar condition, clinical depressive illnesses or exhibiting suicidal tendencies, or a serious heart condition.
I only work with individuals.
I don’t work with vulnerable adults.
I am NOT a substitute for conventional medicine.
I do not treat, prescribe, or diagnose: diseases, serious conditions, or psychiatric disorders.
I do not treat, prescribe, or diagnose: diseases, serious conditions, or psychiatric disorders.
Questions A Smart Person Would Ask:
Can I do the hypnosis session in my car?
Yes, a lot of people do. In fact, I recommend it.What you need is an area where no one, even pets, will disturb you. A chair to sit in, and strong wi-fi.A car, with solid wi-fi covers all that.As long as you're not dumb enough to do this while driving, of course.
What about vaping?
Yes, this process works for vaping too.
What about weed?
Yep, weed too. It's a flexible process.
Why do you NOT offer money back guarantees?
Because I don't like thieves or serial refund-ers.The people who buy because of refund policies, tend to be the people who love asking for refunds. Even when the session works! Because they're thieves!And others buy because they want to TRY to stop smoking!I don't want TRY-ers, I want DO-ers!People who'll follow the process, even if you don't like it, so they'll get the result!
So, you're trapped in a cycle of waking up, getting sucked into a screen, sleeping, and repeating. . .
I can help you shove a stake in the Screen Addiction Vampire and burn it to death! In ONE HOUR!!!
Y'know the funny thing about screen addiction. . .
The feeling you have when you're so absorbed into TikTok, X, Porn, etc. . . that you lose all track of time?So when you look at the clock, you gasp "Holy sh1t, it's already 3am! It just felt like ten minutes!"That's hypnosis. Except. . .where screens pump poison into your skull,I show you how to drain the poison!
And before you ask. . .
Screen addiction includes:
P*rn,
Gaming,
Listening to YouTube music videos on repeat,
TikTok (or any social media) addiction,
Online gambling addiction,
or anything else keeping you addicted to your phone, laptop, or any other screen!
So, you may be wondering. . .
. . . How Does This Work?
We meet on zoom.
We see if we're a solid fit to work together. . .
We go through formalities: How bad is the problem on a scale of 0 to 10? What would you like to replace the anxiety with (dragon energy, berserker confidence, love for all mankind, etc.)?
We do some neurological exercises. . .
I use hypnosis to guide you into the Labyrinth of your subconscious mind. . .
YOU slay the anxiety beast!
I help you install the (dragon energy, berserker confidence, love for all mankind, etc. . .) from step 2,
Exit hypnosis. Welcome to the anxiety-free world!
However (and this is important),
Before you slap your credit card in my face, there are two things you need to know:
2 Reasons You Shouldn't Do This!
You're being coerced, nagged, or dragged into this be a friend or loved one - I can't force hypnosis on anyone. If you don't want it, you're not going to follow the hypnosis process, so nothing's going to happen. In the end you just waste both our time.
You haven't made a plan yet - What are you going to do with all the new time you have? Learn martial arts, join a gym, start a part-time gig on Upwork? If you're sitting around bored, you're likely to fall back into screens again. You don't want that life, do you?
How Much Does This Cost?
A ONE-TIME PAYMENT of 800 Euro!
Disclaimers:
All my sessions are recorded.
You must be over 18.
I don't work with people who have these conditions: schizophrenia, pathological personality, alcohol or drug psychosis, senility, epilepsy and narcolepsy, bi-polar condition, clinical depressive illnesses or exhibiting suicidal tendencies, or a serious heart condition.
I only work with individuals.
I don’t work with vulnerable adults.
I am NOT a substitute for conventional medicine.
I do not treat, prescribe, or diagnose: diseases, serious conditions, or psychiatric disorders.
What if I need like, a hundred sessions? Or if I get addicted again! What then?
If you need more than one session, you're in luck! Because I offer something, no other hypnotist (to my knowledge and I've met a LOT of them) offers for screen addiction. . .
The Lawrence Bartley
Lifetime Guarantee!
Meaning if you need more than one session, be it two, ten, or even a hundred, I'll still help you! At no extra cost!Even if it's one year or fifty years from our first session!And should something ever happen that knocks you back into screen addiction again. . . I'll help you break the addiction again! Still for free!
(Lawrence Bartley Hypnosis, like all service businesses, has the right to refuse service to any client who is abusive or makes me uncomfortable.)
Questions a smart peron would ask:
Can hypnosis even help me because I can't relax!?!
Hypnosis doesn't require relaxation to work!Reason most hypnotists use relaxation is because they're stupid they haven't learned the principles of hypnosis.There are many types of hypnosis that use relaxation. And there are a lot more methods that don't. Any hypnotist who insists on relaxation is an idiot needs to revise their training.
I don't think I have the attention span for hypnosis. What do I do?
Remember how hypnosis is the same force making you addicted to screens. Meaning if you're addicted to screens, you're already hypnotised.I'll show you a more useful way of being hypnotised where you can RELEASE your addiction and whatever mind poisons caused it.
What kind of sick, twisted degenerate REFUSES to put his CONTACT Info on his Contact Me page!?
The kind who says you should have gone through the FAQ Page FIRST, if you had a question!Instead you're sitting there making the FAQ page, which will answer 90% of the questions people have, feel neglected.Neglected like an abandoned child. In a hobo box. In a dark ally. Cryin'. And it's raining. In the middle of winter. And wolves are howling because it's a post apocalyptic-hellscape. And that's on YOU! Because you couldn't be bothered going to the FAQ page first!
But, what if you have a question I haven't answered in the FAQ Page?
Not possible. If you read the FAQ Page, you'd know why you wouldn't still be here!Don't make your laziness someone else's problem!
Thing 'bout consultation calls is, they're basically sales pitches. . .
You really want to have a 20 minute sales pitch with the Crown Prince of Hypnosis?I'm literally trained to bend your mind to my reality. (It's why you now see consultation calls as sales pitches. Your welcome😎!)Why would you want to inconvenience yourself with a 20 minute call scheduled two weeks from now, when you can read the FAQ page right now instead?Or join The Labyrinth Newsletter so you can email me directly.Or send me a DM on X.Plenty of options without wasting both of our time.
Need hypnosis for a special problem?
Here's the "So happy, it's like being hugged by a cat" good news. . .
I can still help you become the gladiator version of yourself!Because the hypnosis process will help you solve a LOT of problems.
What I can help you overcome:
Anger Issues,
Constant Shame,
Self-Hatred,
Attachment Issues,
Feelings of worthlessness,
Stress,
Overwhelm,
Burnout,
Almost every mental block that fills in the blank: "I just can't seem to [mental block] to [goal]"
Fears,
Phobias,
And pretty much (excluding the stuff mentioned in disclaimers section) every problem with repressed emotion as the root cause!
"Oh boy, this sounds wonderfully splendiforous, there's no way there could be a downside, right? RIGHT?!"
. . .
. . .
Well, thing is. . .
Here's the "I'm sorry, your cat is dead" bad news:
To prevent people who are un-serious from wasting my time, I don't offer refunds.If you're not 100% committed to updating your brain programming, this isn't for you.
SIDENOTE: No refunds only applies to people I work with.If I choose NOT to work with you, you will get a refund in full!
(Lawrence Bartley Hypnosis, like all service businesses, has the right to refuse service to any client who is abusive or makes me uncomfortable.)
But wait, there's more:
Here's the "I'm sorry, I'm the one who killed your cat" worse news:
I only help you release emotional gunk. I DON'T work with:
Cancer - I can help with anxieties, fears, grief, and the emotional journey of having cancer, BUT I do not work with cancer itself,
Weight loss/management,
Drug Addiction,
Allergies,
PHYSICAL Pain,
But even if you're solid with those conditions, there's still the. . .
"I'm sorry, your cat was the secret reincarnation of Adolf HiLter and I did what had to be done" worst news:
The LEGENDARY Lawrence Bartley Lifetime Guarantee. . .
is PER PROBLEM!Meaning if you work with me for anger issues, you'll get as many sessions as you need to solve the anger issues.However. . .If you THEN decide to work with me on attachment issues, you'll be paying (another one time payment) for the attachment issues sessions. Because it's a new problem.
So, how do these sessions work?
We have a one-hour long recorded Zoom meeting
You tell me how bad the problem is on a scale of 0 to 10.
You tell me what you want to feel instead of the problem E.g. "I want Viking Energy", "The blood of a lion," or "I want peace again",
I guide you into hypnosis and help your subconscious mind resolve the problem.
I help your subconscious install a program to give you what you want. E.g. "I want Viking Energy", "The blood of a lion," or "I want peace again",
You exit hypnosis and we're done.
How much is my wallet gonna bleed?
800 Euro per session! 60 Minutes per Session!
Disclaimers:
All my sessions are recorded.
You must be over 18.
I don't work with people who have these conditions: schizophrenia, pathological personality, alcohol or drug psychosis, senility, epilepsy and narcolepsy, bi-polar condition, clinical depressive illnesses or exhibiting suicidal tendencies, or a serious heart condition.
I do NOT work with PHYSICAL pain, weight management, or drug addiction,
I only work with individuals.
I don’t work with vulnerable adults.
I am NOT a substitute for conventional medicine.
I do not treat, prescribe, or diagnose: diseases, serious conditions, or psychiatric disorders.
All the violent parts of my writing are either metaphors or jokes. If you really needed me to point that out to you, you're probably not smart enough for this.Lawrence Bartley doesn't advocate violence, in any form, be it against a cat or an idiot who doesn't know what a joke is.